Healing by Choice or by Trauma – 4 Simple Steps to Radical Forgiveness

Are you the kind of person who is prone to self criticism, guilt, making yourself wrong, feeling bad about yourself and generally beating yourself up? You are not alone.

“The power of this work, releasing victim-hood, is the key to health, personal power, and spiritual evolution.  We’ve been addicted to the victim archetype for eons and as we move into the Aquarian Age, 2000 year period of spiritual evolution, we must answer the call to let go of the past, release the victim archetype and be more aware of life occurring in the moment.”  Colin Tipping

One of my favorite books is Colin’s Radical Forgiveness on “The Tipping Method” – a way to truly forgive your enemies, create your future and awaken to the truth of who you are.  So I was super excited to talk to him about awakening to the truth of who you are, healing victim consciousness through radical forgiveness.

I feel that many people are stuck there, with forgiving ourselves. I think that is the biggest block. People are stuck with “Why is this keep happening to me?” Victim consciousness has a subtle way of sabotaging your personal power you use to create with. But Colin, on the other hand says that “we’re at the point where we can choose not to have it be that way by doing the work ourselves, by doing it with other people, forgiving ourselves as well and accepting things the way they are through radical acceptance, so that we can get ahead of the game by doing the work that is necessary that will help us to shift our consciousness in an easy way because we are prepared for it.  We are prepared for it in terms of being prepared for what might happen, but our own consciousness is prepared in the sense that it will be more love based than fear based and greed based.”

When you no longer hold the victimhood mindset, you become empowered to create a very new and exciting future!

Why Are You Here?  What is Your Purpose?

Your lessons in life on earth are to help you evolve spiritually.  You came to the physical plane to expand your awareness of oneness; experiencing separation on earth helps you to know what oneness is.  This separation can take the form of a variety of events, sometimes extreme events like abandonment and abuse, which furthers your feelings of separation. 

Whether you know it or not, or even want to believe it, you are re- creating situations where you feel the pain of separation that you felt in childhood.  You’ll repeat these situations over and over again through people you choose to interact with until you realize that the original pain was for your soul to experience separateness in order to forgive and come back to oneness. Once you’ve woken up to that fact and remembered who you are, you don’t need to do that anymore. These are the results of healing through radical forgiveness.

Forgiving Others

It takes a total paradigm shift to realize that you actually wanted such painful experiences.  By not being open to this new way of thinking, you’ll always consider yourself as victimized by others.  Instead of feeling the victim, why not say “Wow, thank you for giving me this experience that my soul wanted.”  It’s a very proactive and liberating approach!

The thing about self forgiveness is also that many people say you have to do it first before you can forgive others.  When I spoke to Colin he said that he didn’t really subscribe to that. Instead, he said that it’s all the same process because when we’re forgiving other people, we’re actually forgiving ourselves.

Moreover, he added that “the self forgiveness is following the same paradigm that everything happens for a reason.  Everything that you’ve ever done is also perfect in that sense; there was a reason why you had to do what you did, even if it seems like it was, in human terms, unforgivable.  In spiritual terms, there was a reason for it and you were playing your part in helping other people heal their stuff.  That’s the basic concept behind the radical self forgiveness.”

Just by doing the forgiveness process, the energy shifts; even if you don’t understand or believe it, it works because it bypasses the brain and goes straight to your spiritual intelligence.  If you’re at least open to Radical Forgiveness you’ll quickly see that it works and live your life with more peace and unconditional love.

During our conversation, Colin shared the thirteen step process for radical self forgiveness which you can hear on the recording.

Emerge-n See – 4 Steps to Forgiving Yourself

Forgiving yourself can be just as hard if not harder than forgiving others, but this is where real spiritual growth occurs.

Here’s a four step emerge-n-see process you can use immediately when you do something you think “Why did I do that!?!”  Saying the following helps you to quickly forgive yourself and reclaim your power of reconnecting with your source of love and inner peace.

Step one:  “Oh my God, look what I just created.”  That is where you take responsibility, but don’t go overboard and think you’re a bad person for having created it.  Healing by choice means taking responsibility.

Step two:  “I notice my judgments and my feelings, but I love myself anyway.”  Judging yourself or beating yourself up doesn’t serve you, it just furthers your separation – so could you let it go?

Step three:  “I am willing to see the perfection in this situation.”  The emphasis is on the word “willing.”  You don’t have to see the perfection but be willing to see it.  You might have to say that through clenched teeth, too, but say it anyway.

Step Four:  “I choose peace.”  You always have the choice to come back to the inner space of love and inner peace that is always there and never left you.

Are you ready to awaken to the truth and power of who you really are?  Check out Colin’s Radical Self Forgiveness/Self Acceptance – Releasing Toxic Secrets 3-Part Online Program





Colin Tipping, is the author of several books, including Radical Forgiveness an in-demand speaker, a world-renowned workshop leader, taking people through life changing experiences.  He has coined “The Tipping Method” – a way to truly forgive your enemies, create your future and awaken to the truth of who you are.

As a hypnotherapist in the 1980s, he began working with cancer patients. It was during this time he became interested in using forgiveness as a form of therapy because, through research, he found there was a causative factor between lack of forgiveness and the onset of cancer.

Colin found traditional forgiveness didn’t work since it’s often difficult for people to forgive since radical forgiveness is energetic in nature, it’s instantaneous and highly effective. Thus, Radical Forgiveness was born, an approach that views everything having a spiritual purpose.






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